Posts Tagged ‘Adelaide’

PHOTO BOMB!, BUT THEN SHE GAVE ME SOME CIDER, SO WE BECAME FRIENDS:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

SCUDDER:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

CREEPY!:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

TAMMY’S DOODLES NOVEMBER 3RD:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

Had a massive spring clean recently. I came across a pile of my old school excercise books. As i flicked through them, i was amazed to see how little completed work they contained, but almost every second page had sketches, drawings, doodles (snort), and artwork. I was never lazy, i guess i was just distracted, looking for an escape. I tore the drawings out, and tossed anything that looked like actual school work. I do believe all these drawings could account for the terrorism, that passes as my version of grammar.

JUST BECAUSE:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

HOLLYWOOD EFFECT:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

SKY TREE:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

Tammys turntable, (So young).

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

Just me and a four track machine. I’ve never professed to be a singer, then again, i’d much rather be aligned with Jan Terri than Jennifer Lopez, so this is a ‘Win-Win’. The following song came to me years ago, whilst thinking about the loss of River Phoenix, and how sad that was.

I’m posting this for my friend Lizze who was a friend of his.

Click on the highlighted link below to listen ..

“PLAY”

RED:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

HAND:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

STANCE:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

BEDFORD STREET:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

MAN IN THE MIDDLE:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

PHOTO BOOTH:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

DAIRY QUEEN:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

TOIDEE:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

RAPTOR:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

RAM ON:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

THE PREZ IN CONS:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

BATMAN:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

LOLZ:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

MELT DOWN:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

COOLANGATTA DOLLS:

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012

VANITY FUR:

Thursday, November 25th, 2010

In a fashion spread that is so common place these days, but not so much in Marta’s time, she took the opportunity to be dressed and stylised as some of her favorite icons. As is now expected of Marta, it was more ‘Razors’ than ‘Cutting’ edge. Pain, self mutilation and careless regard for society’s mores is all de rigour when Marta steps before the camera, so moisten a finger, and prepare to flip through the pages of Marta’s latest documented fashion gift to us ..


ABOVE PIC: Marta tips the hat, and quite possibley the scales, in this tribute to Courtney Love, Marta spared no comfort zone in her dedication to nailing her inspirations, right down to infusing her Courtney-esque wig with head lice, and hacking out a piece of her septum.


ABOVE PIC: Esther Williams never needed goggles, but that isn’t going to stop Marta interpreting what she believes Esther should have been decked out in. In true Marta fashion she insisted that her goggles carry her prescription, so in a fashionabley aqueous act she could wear these goggles with evening wear, and to the theatre.


ABOVE THREE PICS: Annette Funicello come on down!, it’s ‘Beach blanket bingo’ with Marta as she takes to the waves, and risks getting sand in her crack, and a pelt matted by the drying effects of salt water, all in the name of fashion. Speaking of, Marta can’t help herself, she has to fuck with our minds. In the first of the above three photo’s, you can see in tribute to the material girl Madge, Marta got a pair of pliars, and snapped off one of her top mollars, unlike Madge, who merely used black gum make up, Marta self medicated, and snapped the fucker off in front of the bathroom mirror, why? .. for Fah-Fah-Fashion.


ABOVE PIC: Cool as ice, or warm as an ice pipe?, Catherine Deneuve gets the nod here, the all too obvious beret, the beige Jackie O mid seventies jacket, and Marta’s own diamond earings cut from the nastiest mountain in South Africa. What can i say, cool, icey, aloof, chilly .. textbook French.


ABOVE PIC: The first of two biker girl tributes by Marta, and it’s no one you would think. Here Marta takes on the role of the sexually unsatisfied Olive Butler from the UK tv series ‘On the buses’, played by Anna Karen. Poor Olive was always relegated to the side car of her husbands motorbike, which Marta feels was a euphemism for women everywhere, and there circumstance at the time. Marta recognises, and pays tribute to the subtle work done in breaking down these barriers by making sure no bugs ever stuck in her teeth, and it was okay to wear diamonds, even tho relegated to a submissive roll in a motorbike side car, and most importantly, to suck on the exhaust fumes, and get off your nut as you were forced to be merely a passenger (even tho zoning off into the alpha).


ABOVE PIC: Ethnic chic as Marta travels to the Middle East and plays a role within a role, here Marta is styled after Michelle Phillips in ‘Valentino’, who was herself playing Natacha Rambova in the movie, shades of the famous Dali painting, of a painting, of a painting, of a painting etc. A subtle nod also goes out to Linda McCartney who refused to shave her legs, and was pilloried from pillar to post because of this act of non conformity, Marta (who personifies the the words ‘In your face’) does not fuck around, and for weeks before the photo shoot, mainlined testosterone directly into her temple, to ramp up the pelt on her upper chest as a casual ‘Fuck you!’, and as a nod of solidarity to her more hirsute sisters.


ABOVE PIC: The second in the ‘Biker girl’ series, here Marta don’s a ‘Pleather’ jacket, jumps out of the side car, takes the handlebars, and becomes Shelly Winters in ‘Cleopatra Jones’. Note the totally Sixties face viser, the collagen stung lips, and the Easy Rider profile, no happy accidents here.


ABOVE THREE PICS: Marta does Martha (‘Stewart’ that is). Is it any wonder that Marta chose to pay tribute to a woman who’s life has encopassed crocheting colostomy bag covers, macrame wall hangings (used primarilly for auto erotic asphyixiation), and two years hard labour in an all womens prison?, didn’t think so. Anyone who thinks that the cream canister in the first pic is going to be used for the desert is vastly mistaken, Marta knows that nothing rocks your world like having a hit of nitrous from a cream canister, immediately after hammering a bucket bong.

In the second photo Marta contemplates using the flacid chicken as a hat, of course this predates Lady Ga Ga’s meat dress by a good thirty years, but the dripping bacteria from the gibblets swayed Marta away from this act of poultry fashion terrorism, even Marta draws the line at stomach cramps, and projectile gastric in the name of fashion.

Can we please make mention of the stately outfit?, from the drop flowered diamond earrings, the almost, but not quite, hounds tooth dress, the finely cut blouse with what i can only assume are Saville Row tailored sleeves and buttons, and the double, and wide banded watch. All for the kitchen, and all for glamour.


ABOVE PIC: ‘Jocelyn’ nothing more to be said.


ABOVE PIC: Lauren Bacall all the way, Marta makes a flowing entrance, it’s all about the movement and the moment. The scolloped front flows down, but pulls up short of the pubic region, it’s Marta saying ‘You can have a bit, but not everything’. For her cuffs Marta has hacked the cuff’s off an old pair of bell bottom slacks and grafted them on here for winter covereage, i’ve seen this dress worn in spring without the extended arm length, making this dress a little more interactive. The flower burst diamond (of course) earings are on display for all to ogle, and in true Marta fashion, her stockings, or leggings, are actually made from the stretched foam coverings used to protect stone fruits in supermarkets. Jeannie Little may have made a career out of making dresses from garbage bags, but no one recycles waste into fashion like Marta.


ABOVE PIC: With a look of stoicism, unaffected detachement and a serene calm, Marta holds aloft no mere accsesory, but a symbol of repression everywhere in the GLBTI community, the humble turkey baster. Years before ribbons, fundraisers and awareness campaigns, Marta would appear at openings, red carpet roll outs and celebrity events clutching the baster, and much like how Paris Hilton walks around with her rat dog living in her purse (what dog wouldn’t want to live in a confined space packed with drugs) Marta would use this not so much as an accesory, but as more of a statement, to get people talking, to open up a dialog and break down the walls of misunderstanding. In this one photo Marta pays tribute to not only every downtrodden GLBTI actor and actress, but to every GLBTI person who has been shitlisted, shafted, derailed and denied the fundemental, and basic human rights that so many others enjoy. Cast aside your ribbons, and hold aloft the turkey baster as the international symbol of working around, and defeating archaic beliefs and systems, put in place to stop us progressing and procreating. Thank you for this gift Marta, thank you for giving us a visual to identify with, VIVA LA BASTER, VIVA LA MARTA!!.

This collection is dedicated to Shelly, a fine person who knows her Simian style.

BETTER GET A LAWYER:

Thursday, April 27th, 2006

Perth socialite Rose Porteous will be well enough to face trial later this year on charges of altering a prescription, a court has been told.

Ms Porteous has previously pleaded not guilty to fraudulently altering a prescription for the drug Hypnovel last June.

She was also unable to attend court in March, when her lawyer Shane Brennan presented the court with a letter from his client’s psychiatrist saying Ms Porteous was suffering from a suspected “brain stroke”.

NOTE: Is there any other kind?

Magistrate Paul Heaney then rescheduled the case until today to set a new trial date, saying that if Ms Porteous was not able to set a new trial date, she would need more than the psychiatrist’s letter to show she was too sick.

Today Mr Brennan told Registrar Warren Southwell his client would be well enough to face trial.

He also said she needed more than one day to defend the charges.

“It depends on how things transpire,” Mr Brennan said.

“There’s convoluted medical evidence for a start.”

NOTE: How true.

Mr Southwell set the trial down for October 16 and 17.

NOTE: I’m booking my flight and accomodation for this.

Mr Brennan said he had been unable to give warning before the January trial.

“Unfortunately the state of my client’s illness was not apparent until close to the trial date,” Mr Brennan said.

MELBOURNE:

Sunday, April 23rd, 2006

I’m spending a few days in Melbourne with my mate Phillip, he can be found wired for sound and photo’s at www.melbourneloft.com while down here i’m going to catch up with as many friends as i possibley can including Dicko and Garry who i’ll be appearing alongside on the radio tomorrow night www.stereo974.com

Melbourne as ever is fantastic, the only thing that would stop me moving here is the fact that it’s so special every time i visit, i dont ever want to take it for granted.

DARH-LINK:

Tuesday, April 18th, 2006

You know it was just one of those day’s, a lazy Sunday afternoon, the sun was shining bright, all was right with the world and I was catching up with my friend Dave from Melbourne who I hadn’t seen in over twelve months, as we window shopped our way up and down King St Newtown we turned into an antique store

.. Like a beacon on an ink black night something caught our eyes high up on a shelf, a glowing pink box, a sight so rare, so majestic, it drew us to it as if moving in slow motion, just before we reached it I caught Dave faltering out of the corner of my eyes, I read his face as it creased and spelt out ‘No, this can’t be real .. I’m not seeing this wondrous item before me’ I gathered my composure and continued forward until my hand clasped around this most precious prize, I knew at that moment that we would not be separated ..

Dave’s eyes were misty as he continued forward in slow motion towards me, a guttural ‘Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!’ could be heard escaping from his lips.

I held my purchase aloft, I clasped it to my chest .. I wanted for a moment to be at one with it, to connect .. after all, it’s not every day a boy finds an original Eva Gabor wig in it’s original packaging, in mint condition for only $15.00 is it?

UNCLE:

Tuesday, April 18th, 2006

Sunday we celebrated my nephews birthday, what does a caring and responsible uncle like myself buy him for a present? .. non other than this totally toxic and highly flamable Michael Jackson wig and hat. The above photo is what they used on the packaging, i’m thinking this faux afro isnt an officially licenced product from ‘Neverland enterprises’

JOAN:

Thursday, April 13th, 2006

A big thrill for me whilst in America was getting to visit Joan Crawford’s house in Brentwood, quite close to where Marilyn Monroe lived.
Some of the photo’s i have of Joan are quite bizzare, whilst i’m not sure the following two classify as bizzare they are a little weird.

PHOTO # 1

In this photo it looks as if Joan was auditioning for the role of Marge Simpson.

PHOTO # 2

Here we have Joan with Colonel Sanders, probably trying to tie up a cross promotion with KFC and Joan’s beloved Pepsi.

PATSY BISCOE AKE PATE BISCUIT:

Wednesday, April 12th, 2006

Another op shop find last week was an album from my past, the ‘Patsy Biscoe songbook’ Patsy used to be on the Aussie kids show ‘Here’s Humphrey’ each day Patsy would lead the children at in a sing along, how exciting! i can still remember Patsy’s distinctive finger picking style on her ‘folk’ guitar, many years later poor Patsy down graded and was reduced to busking on ‘Fat cat and friends’ .. a poor man’s ‘Humphrey’ by any measure, altho Fat Cat is the source of one of my favorite jokes ever ‘What’s the difference between you and Fat Cat? .. Fat Cat had friends!’

Most recently Patsy was seen on the ‘Big Gig’ a fantastic comedy show, they used to have a charactor on the show called Pate’ Biscuit who looked and acted an awful lot like Patsy, except Pate’ would tell horrible and horrid stories to the ‘Children at home’ one night in the middle of Pate’s act the real Patsy turned up and had a go at her clone nemesis, i must have a photo of that somewhere.

The one thing i forgot was how mega Patsy’s hair was in the early day’s .. no wonder i had a soft spot for her.

ROSE PORTEOUS UPDATE:

Wednesday, April 12th, 2006

Chaos is surrounding poor Rose Porteous at the moment, first she was arrested for falsifying a medical pescription, she had altered the script so it had more repeats .. a lot more repeats. The best part is Rose’s defense, she claims she mistook the script for a lotto form and that’s why she wrote down the large number! is it any wonder we love her so?

When Rose was due to appear in court to face the charges she was aledgedy too ill to attend, this didn’t stop her however appearing at a charity shoe auction, you can see Rose in the photo below modeling her shoe with a HUGE diamond on the toe.

Soon after Rose collapsed .. I have a vast number of clippings documenting Rose’s collapses, I think Rose has dropped more times than Jason Donovan at his most ‘asthmatic’ but this time it’s reported Rose has had a stroke.

Compounding this was the trauma of watching her former home .. the legendary ‘Prix d’amour’ smashed to the ground by the demolition men, what a sad end to a house that has seen so many outrageous acts and incidents.

PHOTO # 1

Rose raises a foot adorned with a sparkly rock for charity.

PHOTO # 2

The tractors claw gouges away at Roses portico, it almost looks like performance art.

PHOTO # 3

My photo of Rose which adorns my fridge door, here we can see i have added Adam’s false eyelashes to Rose’s photo .. stunning.

HITCHIN:

Friday, April 7th, 2006

Sight of the day .. I’m driving along the road and there was some school’s cross country run under way, there were a couple of hundred kids running along the footpath, some were sprinting, some jogging and a few puffing and snorting, one kid tho had obviously had enough, he stood on the side of the road hitchhiking!.

DUSTY:

Thursday, April 6th, 2006

Spent a great weekend in Sydney with Adam ,his mum and our friend Min. We went to the glam(less) Star City Casino to see the musical ‘Dusty’ which i must admit i was pretty impressed by, my sister is a Dusty freak from way back and she is now popping to go. Before we go to the casino we took a walk through Newtown and had lunch, we all agreed that if we ever had to move to Sydney Newtown is still the place we’d all choose to live.

PHOTO 1

That’s me, Adam and Adam’s mum having lunch in Newtown at the North Indian Diner, this is a pretty famous place in Newtown, it’s really popular probably because it’s so cheap and great value, i found myself having a ‘bizaro moment’ while sitting there, i was zoning out thinking of all times and situations i’ve found myself eating in this place, some of them quite bizzare, some just plain happy and joyful, and now here i was sitting with my boyfriend and his mum .. it was just one of those ‘Did i ever imagine back then that i’d be sitting here years later with someone i love and adore, along with his mum’ moments? .. like i said, bizaro.

PHOTO 2

Hmmmmm, the remanants of my lunch, a glob of fetta cheese, i looked at this and thought ‘Thats probably what the inside of one of my arteries look’s like’ i have now sworn off a lot of globby food and i’m back to swimming.

PHOTO 3

Dusty, a true legend .. do yourselves the preverbial favour and give her another listen, what a pure and soulful voice.

PHOTO 4

Would this sign prick your conscience?

PHOTO 5

Glamour stairs.

PHOTO 6

Me’n’Min

NINE LIVES:

Thursday, April 6th, 2006

Surely this sad excuse for a human being has used up all of his political lives by now?


LOCAL BOY MAKES GOOD:

Thursday, April 6th, 2006

A couple of photo’s of Ben Kersten who won gold in the comonwealth games, he lives in Kiama but used to live in Figtree just around the corner from the very first ‘protoloft’ www.melbourneloft.com


FRIENDS AND HIGH HAIR:

Sunday, March 26th, 2006

We’ve had a long hot summer down, we’re a month into autumn and still we’re heading to the beach swimming and surfing, the lucky thing for me is I live really close to the beach, so it doesn’t take too much arm twisting for friends to head over for a visit, and that’s whats been happening the last several weeks, a visit, a swim and then out to dinner. One terrifying consequence of me spending time in salt water is for whatever reason or phenomena my hair stands up on end in spikes, poor Phillip at www.melbourneloft.com has horrible nighmares at the mere thought of of one strand of my hair raising itself from my scalp, I must mention Phillip performed many interventions on me in the early 90’s during some ‘experimental’ hair periods.

CRYSTAL PILLARS:

HIGH HAIR:

DINNER:

MOUNTIE:

Tuesday, February 28th, 2006

Alas our buddy, friend and pal Marc has now returned to the land of the long white something or other, we said our goodbyes over yummy Mexican food at Amigo’s, hopefully Marc will be back before too long or barring that, Adam and i will be able to sashay over to Canada.


FAIRLY FAIR DAY:

Tuesday, February 28th, 2006

And so another Mardi Gras Fair Day comes around and most every queen and dyke frets over what to wear whilst looking stylishly unconcerned. T’was a fun day and made all the more so because we organized ourselves so we were all in town at the same time and together, we moved and walked as a pack and it was hard not to feel a sense of pride at the beautiful and wonderous friends i was surrounded by, slowly the scorching sun and soup like humidity took it’s toll and friends slowly peeled away to search for cooler climes, the hardy amongst us found shade and the beer tent. I was somewhat heartend that this year i was not handed one flyer for a gym or tanning salon, perhaps i now carry the air of a lost cause on those counts, and the question begs to be asked .. why am i the only one not wearing my sunnies in the group photo’s, even tho i had them on me, should i read more into this than i am?




MONKEY BELLY:

Tuesday, February 28th, 2006

I’m partial to a monkey belly on a guy, and i’m partial to Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys, put the two together and we have a winning combination.

STRIKE A POSE:

Tuesday, February 21st, 2006

To placate the baying mobs of Marta fans who want more more more fashion, stand by for a spread of shere cutting edge beauty.

Photo # 1

Annie the primate Oakly, who would have ever thought tassles could look so alluring against a backdrop of natural fur? once again Marta shows that a real lady never steps outside the front door without earings, no one does ear furniture like Marta.

Photo # 2

Ya gotta love a girl who wears a ribbon tie, here we have Marta stepping out for a little show jumping, the Cindy Crawford beauty spots says ‘Look at me!, i am fantastic’.

Photo # 3

Not Marta, but a co-star showing how mutton chop sideburns were’nt the sole domain of Bernard King.