FIDO AU GO GO:

I think i want to date a dog owner, if they’re willing, and able to trail the pooch, and happy to scoop up, and bag it’s stools. I can only wonder at what they’d be willing to do for a devoted partner.

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JERRY:

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THE MORNING AFTER:

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ALL YOU NEED IS CYCLONE FENCING:

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LADIES DAY OUT:

I ONCE heard JFK make a speech where he mentioned the percentage of salt to water in the human body, is approximately the same ratio of water to salt in sea water.

If thus, it would explain the effect being around water, and inparticular the sea has on me. I’ve always felt very drawn to the ocean, and very calm and safe in it’s presence. I’m the worlds biggest fraidy cat about anything you care to name, but put me in the ocean and i’m fearless, tho very respectful as taught by my dad.

Being under the Aquarius star sign may also have something to do with this sense of confort i get from the sea. I have never become complaceant at the wonder that is Sydney Harbour, the luxury of sitting back outside The Opera House to the sound of lapping water.

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RESPECT:

After spending the day with my mum in hospital whilst she had a hidious procedure, and seeing the distress and pain of many other aged patients, i was reminded of this photo of Bette Davis i saw years ago, more true words have never been cross stitched.

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ORGAN GRINDER:

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SCHOOL CATCH UP:

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SCOOP:

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AUTO TUNING:

“When we hold on to our opinions with aggression, no matter how valid our cause, we are simply adding more aggression to the planet, and violence and pain increase. Cultivating non-aggression is cultivating peace. The way to stop the war is to stop hating the enemy. It starts with seeing our opinions of ourselves and of others as simply our take on reality and not making them a reason to increase the negativity on the planet.” – Pema Chodron.

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TEDDY’S TOAST:

“There are good ships, and there are wood ships, the ships that sail the sea. But the best ships are friendships, and may they always be.”

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FABULOUS!!:

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NEWTOWN WINDOW:

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PRETTY, PRETTY DOCTOR SMITH:

Without doubt the sexiest Martian ever, Athena the green lady also proved that aliens aren’t necessarily a smarter race than humans, when poor old Athena tried to ‘turn’ Dr Smith, surely one squeal from HIM should have given her the biggest hint.

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THE TAP:

Just listened to a half hour radio special on Helen Reddy on the drive to Sydney, I couldn’t figure how I knew every word, to every song, then a dark corner of my past cracked open, and I remembered when I was really little I was obsessed with her. HELLO!, couldn’t somebody have nudged me and given me the whisper ‘Greg, you’re a fah-laming QUEEN!!’ – “Angie baby, living in a world of make believe” Helen, you were speaking to me, and I didn’t even know it!.

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APATHY IS THE GREATEST WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION:

So CHOGM is over, and i bet no one pissed in Robert Mugabes Champagne, or shit in his punch bowl .. what a waste.

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SHIT LEOPARD:

“A shit Leopard never changes it’s shit spots” – Jim Lahey.

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CHARLES HAWTRY AND THE DEAF AIDS:

I got all excited thinking this was Charles Hawtry, and the Gayest pumpkin i’d ever seen, then i realised it was Bill Gates 🙁

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SCHADENFREUDE:

That glorious moment when the person talking to you forgets it’s you, and then says something as if they’re talking about you to someone else, then that microsecond in time when they realise what they’ve done, as do you, then get to feast on them panic, trying to figure how to cover it, and to try and deflect the statement. Being the professional that i am, i strung out his agony for at least two full minutes, which is a long time trying to cover the fact you’re a back stabbing, inaccurate gossip. I held a strait face, and covered well, all except my 501 button bursting arousal at his utter and shameful pain.

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A MEETING OF FILTH ELDERS:

Once again i got to cross paths with my senior, and most high ranking Filth Elder John Waters during his recent visit to Sydney. What can i say, i was in calm awe, i felt i was amongst my own, and i was.

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FACES:

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TAKE US WITH YOU!!:

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FAIR DAY 2011, BETTER LATE THAN NEVER:

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DAPTO LEAGUES CLUB RENOVATIONS 2011:

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JUST BECAUSE:

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SCHOOL WALL:

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TYSON AND NICO’S STRIP:

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IMAGE FROM MY CHILDHOOD:

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DUMMIES:

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NOTHING LIKE FINDING A POPCORN MAKER, AND FOOT SPA STILL IN THE BOX AT THE OP SHOP, I’VE ALWAYS FOUND THESE TWO APPLIANCES INTERCHANGEABLE ANYWAY:

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ALL THIS USELESS BEAUTY:

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BAT STAND OFF:

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MELTY GUYS THROUGH PLASTIC:

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VAN GUARD:

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IT’S A DEAL:

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HANGING ON THE TELEPHONE:

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PEPITO THE ICE CREAM LOVING DONKEY:

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VOTE 1 MAUDE:

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CREEPY AND KOOKY:

Once again another sterling evening was had at the Marrickville Polly’s dance this past Saturday, all it takes is a healthy dose of friends, and attitude being checked at the door, and you’re bound to have a ball (or a toasted sandwich) at Polly’s.

Nowhere else in Sydney can you be dancing to Lady Ga Ga where the music drops, the crowd is hushed, in the zone dancing, and then over the PA comes the call ‘Don’t forget, the toasted sangers are off in ten minutes, and tickets for the bus to the Taxi Club are now for sale .. back to Ga Gag’ i love it!!, it’s so Camp, it’s so community, and it’s so without the beige polish that has decended upon many venues, and locations in our community.

I never feel guilty having a big meal before Polly’s, because i know i’m going to dance it all off later on the dance floor, nowhere else do i dance non stop and never leave the floor, all the stars align, and everything in the universe is great when you get a run of song’s like ‘Born this way’, followed by Diana Ross and ‘Chain reaction’ and then best of all, the slam dunk, ‘Amarillo’!!, i must take this opportunity to state to Polly’s, and all who sail her, if there ‘EVER’ comes a dance, and ‘Amarillo’ is NOT played, you can forget about the ‘Occupy Sydney’ protesters, i’ll have a group of smelly ferals come in and squat on the dance floor, Miss Tammy cannot do without her dose of dervish dancing to ‘Amarillo’.

Lastly, big shout out to everyone who helps to run and organise a night like Pollies, many queens swan in without nary a thought to all the work that must go into putting on an event like this, so Miss Tammy would like to take a moment to acknowledge this work, and effort, to say that it is appreciated more than you’ll ever know, so a polite, deep, and pantiless curtsy to Miss Joan, Miss Caroll and everyone from me.

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IT’S TRADE JIM, BUT NOT AS WE KNOW IT (JIM ISN’T SO SURE):

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