{"id":7099,"date":"2016-03-17T16:00:33","date_gmt":"2016-03-17T05:00:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/?p=7099"},"modified":"2016-03-17T16:00:33","modified_gmt":"2016-03-17T05:00:33","slug":"price-check-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/?p=7099","title":{"rendered":"Price check."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"1\"<\/a><\/p>\n

You know who shits me these days?, bitter old check out ladies. <\/p>\n

I think they know their days are numbered, their time of power is waning. No more will they take a set against you, waiting until they get to an inappropriate item, then foist it aloft yelling, “Price check on Home brand Lube!!”. <\/p>\n

Today i was asked, <\/p>\n

‘Do you want your Disney collectors cards?’,<\/strong> <\/p>\n

Yes please, my little nephews collect them. <\/p>\n

‘Here’s three’, <\/strong><\/p>\n

Aren’t I supposed to get one for every twenty dollars spent?, <\/p>\n

‘That’s all I have’,<\/strong> <\/p>\n

Can you get some more?, <\/p>\n

‘No’.<\/strong> <\/p>\n

Then came the stare down, my patented ‘Riiiiiiiiiiiiight’, and the delightful discomfort of the people waiting in line behind me. <\/p>\n

She was treating me like a dealer wielding power over a junkie. I gathered up my creme fraiche and hissed, ‘Self service<\/em>!!’. <\/p>\n

Your days of crushing loaves of bread will soon be over honey.<\/p>\n

\"2\"<\/a> <\/p>\n

A few months ago a guy at Woolies in Wollongong started scanning my stuff, <\/p>\n

“How’s your day sir!?”, <\/p>\n

With the weight of my reality i responded,<\/p>\n

Mate, it’s 7.00pm on a Saturday night, I’m shopping alone, and have soup for one in my trolley, how do you think my fucking night is going??.<\/p>\n

His eyes lit up . .<\/p>\n

“Thank you, THANK YOU!, I have to ask everyone that question!, the only thing people ever say is, ‘Fine’. THANK YOU for telling me the truth!”. <\/p>\n

The gay boy check out chicks love me too. I always present my items for scanning, first in order of cleaning products, then bottled goods, then cold\/frozen groceries, and lastly bread, in its own bag, ‘Of course sir’. <\/p>\n

I always get a knowing nod from them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You know who shits me these days?, bitter old check out ladies. I think they know their days are numbered, their time of power is waning. No more will they take a set against you, waiting until they get to … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[602,97,459,306,680,589,501,360,397,488,246,458,361,226,434,318,775,310,45,362,537,469,35,468,273,779,587,36,311,533],"class_list":["post-7099","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-1970s","tag-australia","tag-brisbane","tag-camp","tag-cinema","tag-dining","tag-drugs","tag-fair-day","tag-fashion","tag-food","tag-gay","tag-gold-coast","tag-guys","tag-john-waters","tag-kings-cross","tag-lesbian","tag-lobster","tag-mardi-gras","tag-melbourne","tag-men","tag-midsumma","tag-movies","tag-newtown","tag-porn","tag-retro","tag-shopping","tag-stoner","tag-sydney","tag-television","tag-wollongong"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7099","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7099"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7099\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7102,"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7099\/revisions\/7102"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7099"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7099"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tammytingles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7099"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}